If you enjoy a wank with other guys you’re at least bisexual
Submitted by Anthony in Middlesborough
I’m an out-and-out poof, I love cock, love sucking it and love getting fucked in the ass. I’ve been checking out the blog for a few weeks and I had to write something about all the confused guys who don’t seem to get that they’re at least bisexual. I don’t care if you don’t like being called that it’s what you are. It’s really simple – if you enjoy the look or feel of other guys cocks you are at least bisexual. Please get over yourselves and admit what you are.
Hi Anthony, thanks for your input, although it could have been worded more reasonably.
But, you’re wrong, and let me tell you why…
- The labels of Homosexual/Bisexual/Heterosexual are all man-made. This is a fact that you cannot deny. Nature didn’t offer us a user manual, we invented these categorizations to enable us to describe an entire group of people in simplistic terms based on, what exactly, a specific sexual act that one might like but another not enjoy? I know more than one gay man who doesn’t do anal sex at all, so are they not gay because they don’t like anal? I know several bisexual guys who love anal with other men, just as I know bisexual men who only enjoy sucking cock or masturbation. I know straight men who love anal with their female partners (receiving), or enjoy seeing gay sex in their porn, or who only enjoy masturbation with other men. So, who decides what sexual acts are indicative of which sexual orientation, you? No, you don’t have any authority.
- Describing all male sexuality as either Gay/Bi/Straight is about as sensible as describing all plant life on the planet as light green/medium green/dark green. You’re attempting to diminish an extremely complex and variable aspect of Human existence into one of three simplistically ridiculous categories. When you get down to calling everyone bisexual, you would then surely need to refine this more depending on the sexual acts they enjoy with members of the same sex. Which labels would you then want to apply to a man you deem to be bisexual but only ever enjoys watching other men on video? What about the man you would deem bisexual who has an entirely “heterosexual” life but enjoys masturbation in the company of other men? Please let me know what your ever growing list of sub-categories would be, it would be interesting to read them all.
- Every serious example of male sexual research shows that sexuality is far more diverse and complex than people like you want to accept, presumably because you’re so desperate to belong to a clan you feel the need to reject anything which might call that sense of belonging into question. Every male sexuality study worth the paper it’s printed on clearly shows that sexuality is incredibly diverse and changes over time too. Male sexuality is influenced by everything; love, fetish, bravado, masculinity, competitiveness, horniness of the given moment, circumstance, environment, partners… there are a million and one things which all combine to create all aspects of our personalities, and the same is true for our sexuality.
[bloketoysad]
So, that’s just a bit of what I could have written in response to your opinion, but I’ll hold back and be reasonable here and just consider you to be something of a simpleton when it comes to understanding sexuality. Unfortunately, there are far too many men out there just like you, on every end of the sexual scale, who also wish to ignore how complex male sexuality actually is and would rather put every man under a simplistic label.
It’s also quite ironic that gay men are often so determined to dictate what the sexuality of others should be, while also screaming bloody murder about being told their sexuality is “wrong”, or an “illness” or some kind of “defect”. How is it that so many gay men who constantly argue against these things being said about them are so willing to say it about others?
I don’t have a problem with whatever label anyone else wants to put on me, it makes absolutely no difference to my enjoyment of my own cock and my love of everyone elses. If we’re honest bisexual is probably the best categorization for what I enjoy, if I chose to adopt any label. The fact of the matter is that it’s not the job of Anthony or anyone else to be telling anyone what their sexuality is. This is about self-identification, the right we all have to live as we see fit, without being told how to live, what to think and what to believe.
Anthony dont know what the fuck hes talking about. Like a lot of gay men though he cant get his little brain around the idea that fetishes are not the same as wanting to run away and marry another guy.
I actually agree with the original poster, although I’d edit what he said and say If you enjoy a wank with others guys you are NOT heterosexual. Sexuality has nothing to do with the type of relationship you are in, just what sexual relations you prefer. If you’re going to use the man-made labels, you should be using the correct one.
If a man enjoys jerking off with another man, he enjoys the arousal of having that man in the same room around his penis, so therefor he cannot by definition be “heterosexual”; however, it doesn’t necessarily make him bi-sexual, he could be a stem off form of bi-sexual such as enjoying trans-men, trans-women, women, and men. Pansexuality is very common especially online around experienced internet communities.
There is also the idea that as stated above in Gymbuddy’s comment, that sexuality has to do with whether or not you want to be in a committed relationship with someone. I have to tell you that i can see men being confused this way, but believe me when I say: Many people who are sexual don’t in fact want to be in relationships with those they are sexual with.
As for the rebuttal/response given, yes labels are again man-made, but if you are to be using them, then use the correct ones; however, if your sexuality is “undefined” then more power to you. In this society (westernized) it’s very difficult to have an “undefined” anything as people need labels usually to decide whether or not you’re worthy of their attention or not.
One last thing: Both comments to this post regarded that it was just gay men that helped sliding people into labels. Believe me when I say I’ve seen way more heterosexual men trying to define themselves “not gay” around their heterosexual friends, than homosexuals trying to tell a man the obvious. Also another pet peeve of mine is when someone gets soooo defensive when you tell them something they’re doing would be considered gay, and they seem all disgusted by the thought of them having anything to do with it. Hopefully soon men like the men on this website will realize it’s okay to label yourself as bisexual – or “undefined” – and not feel as if they are any less of a man.
~Sexuality is part of life. There is no reason to be ashamed of enjoying the sweet sensation of an orgasm that is right for you.
I agree with much of what you’ve said, but I disagree that anyone should feel the need to accept a label and I don’t believe their refusal to do so has anything to do with shame. As you state, these are man-made labels, and they are simplistic in nature and, really, inadequate when attempting to describe your sexuality.
I believe, for most of our readers here, they wouldn’t have a problem describing themselves as one or another, if they truly felt that they fit into the perceived category (note I say perceived, rather than actual). The problem isn’t the labels, it’s the sociological perception of what that label entails.
I can’t count the number of men I know who describe themselves as bicurious, even though they’ve been masturbating with men for more than ten years. Surely there should come a time when curiosity becomes awareness? The natural progression would then entail them calling themselves bisexual, but they choose not to go this far because when you tell someone you’re bisexual they instantly believe you enjoy anal sex.
You state yourself that many young people are now choosing to describe themselves as Pansexual, and I think this really answers the question. They do so because this leaves them open to describing their sexual interests to those who need such a description in a more honest and open way. They understand that it’s far more complex than the traditional three labels allow.
In my own exploration of the subject it certainly seems to me that more and more young men are ignoring any labels at all, and being more open about their sexual interests without having to subscribe to a particular “tribe”.
I think this is far healthier.
Thanks for your comment!