The BuddyBate guide to starting a jack off club

Starting a jack off club is easy and we want to give you as much information as possible to get you going.

This is a long and comprehensive post, I would recommend taking a few notes.

INTRODUCTION

Masturbation clubs for men have existed for centuries, although evidence of such clubs can be limited.

Unless you’re a historian with a special interest in secretive societies of the past it’s almost impossible to discover information about them publicly.

One of the most famous is the Beggar’s Benison. Believed to have opened its doors in the 18th century this club existed for many decades. It also allegedly created offshoots of which even less is known. Rumors persist that it still holds influence in the student bodies of previously associated colleges.

The Hellfire Club is another. In operation around the same time as the Beggar’s Benison – and believed to have been linked to the Scottish order via its members – this club was famed for its debauchery and celebrity membership. Politicians and leading figures in business and the arts were believed to gather for their events. Activities ranged from simple drunken parties to orgies and group masturbation.

There are numerous others, of course. Thousands of such secretive clubs have existed throughout the centuries, going all the way back beyond the Romans and Greeks.

While knowledge of groups might be scarce and it seems there was a lull at the start of the 20th century, it’s implausible to believe they simply ended. Men were still enjoying their masturbation with each other. Throughout the 1920s, 30s and 40s it’s highly likely that such clubs were still in operation, only under considerable secrecy.

Photographer Bob Mizer created the Athletic Model Guild in 1950 but he began photographing male models in the 1940s. This informal company (theoretically illegal at the time) published Physique Pictorial. The quarterly magazine depicted young and muscular men in various poses. Many of these shoots were erotic and clearly intended to suggest the act of shared masturbation. Indeed, it’s believed that many of the models at the time were engaged in such a community. With homosexuality still considered taboo – and often punishable – the act of shared masturbation was considered more acceptable.

A large number of the images depicted male friendships, guys at ease with each other, naked and sometimes erect.

It was perhaps the first incarnation of “bromosexual” media, which many mistakenly believe is a modern creation.

In the 1960s and 70s notions of sexuality changed considerably again. A new generation of rebellious young people were rediscovering all manner of sexual activities. While there’s no evidence I can find to prove the existence of formal male masturbation clubs at this time we can assume they existed.

Throughout these decades male college fraternities were also engaging in many sexually charged activities. Events have been described by numerous members of those collectives in the decades since. These activities were often characterized as initiations or traditions. The reality is that gathering so many young and virile men together will lead to sexual interest and exploration.

We know that male masturbation groups made a resurgence in the 1980s, more through necessity than awareness of this colorful history.

The AIDS epidemic was a terrible time. The mysterious and deadly disease was afflicting hundreds of thousands of men, predominantly in the gay/bisexual communities. When it began to be theorized that this was a sexually transmitted virus attitudes to sex quickly changed. Masturbation clubs soon started appearing, allowing men to gather for mutual pleasure in a safer way.

Such groups continued to grow, fade away, start up again, disappear, reappear… All throughout the 1990s and 2000s these clubs would sporadically start up through little more than word of mouth.

Then the internet came along, and everything changed once more.

With sites like Yahoo! groups, MSN Groups and Blogger men could finally organize in an easy and quick way. Events could be planned and invites could be sent. Gatherings could see hundreds of men arriving to participate. Communities developed and offshoots began. New clubs opened in new cities. Venues discovered a profitable new business opportunity in hosting these men and adopted the local club for a regular residency.

Masturbation clubs were more popular than they had ever been.

And so here we are, with communities all around the world. There are potentially hundreds of organized clubs to join. We work hard to find them all and share them with our readers. Our intent is to show men that there is a community out there, either one already enjoying masturbation together or guys hoping for someone to start a club in their city.

We recently reported on the success of the London Jack Off Club and their move to weekly gatherings. Understandably, this has inspired a lot of readers to ask why they don’t have a similar club in their city.

The LJOC club only started in 2016, but it’s grown from strength to strength in recent years. It’s thriving despite the shut downs during the pandemic. Originally starting as an occasional event, at different venues, they soon found a home at the Bunker Bar. It quickly became apparent that there was a need to host a monthly gathering. This then became a bi-monthly event, and in 2022 it moved to weekly.

Every Monday up to 100 straight, bisexual, gay or just open-minded men gather at the Bunker Bar for several hours of masturbation with each other.

The crowd is diverse. Guys from 18 to 60 attend, all kinds of builds, all kinds of backgrounds, all kinds of cocks. Members can meet the mechanic who just left the garage and needs to get his dick wanked, or the banker who just had a hard day at the office and wants to join a circle of eager strokers. Married straight men meet gay twinks. Gym going bators meet bearish daddies. It’s a party environment were erections are swinging and friendly hands are rubbing.

The success of this event is clearly shown in the fact that it would often sell out. With a limit of 100 attendees it was the only event held at the Bunker Bar which required tickets to be sold, but this has now been changed to walk-up. While capacity is limited, removing the ticketing allows more men to experience the fun each night.

With hundreds of thousands – or even millions – of men in your city there’s clearly an audience for it. So why don’t you have a club like this?

STARTING A JACK OFF CLUB CLUB

Any town or city with a reasonable population could host a sustainable bator club, and there are only four hurdles to overcome.

1. Willingness to lead

First and foremost, you need someone who is interested in starting a jack off club in your area. It might seem like a daunting task but it doesn’t need to be. Considering you’ve got this far in this post, it’s likely you’re the one who could get all of this going.

If you’ve had a little experience of jacking off with other guys you already have a head start. You know what you want from this local community. You have a good level of confidence and drive to get it going. If you’re never likely to attend a jack off club yourself, you’re probably not the right person to be starting a jack off club.

If, in theory, you’d be the first through the door if your local sauna or men’s spa hosted a bator themed night, you’re more likely to be successful in your attempt to get it going. For the horny observer who keeps telling himself he might one day masturbate with another guy, starting a jack off club isn’t for you.

You can inquire with a venue and ask if they hold such an event, perhaps put the seed in their mind and give them the idea to start one, but if you’re not engaged in the fun of shared masturbation already you probably aren’t the right person to be planning and organizing these events.

2. Venue

Starting a jack off club means you need a place to gather. It needs to be suitable for an event such as this. Many formal clubs utilize an adult space which already exists for that purpose, such as a sex club, bar or men’s sauna. Most larger cities have several venues to choose from, but the pandemic might have put them into difficulty. This could work in your favour, though. If a venue really needs to get an audience and revenues back up perhaps they’d be more willing to host?

I would recommend looking around at the venues you have locally. If there are any which already hold adult events and they don’t host a jack off party, why not suggest it to them? They don’t have much to lose if they’re hosting it on a quiet night where footfall is slow.

While bars or clubs might be a little more reluctant to host such an adult party saunas are usually hosting themed events already. They might just need someone to get things started. Inquire with these venues first. See if they have a themed night already suited to mutual masturbation. If they don’t, ask about the possibility of starting a jack off club on a night when they’re usually quiet.

Depending on how much you want to control or manage this club the venue might be happy with you planning and hosting in their space. Alternatively you could just propose this event to them and let them do the rest. Pointing out the success of the London club might spur them into action.

Some jack off clubs are hosted in residential spaces. Although these are often limited in size and capability they’re still a great way to get a club started. Even if you can only invite 20 attendees you could hold several a month, giving more men the opportunity to explore. It would be easier to convince a venue such as a sauna to accept your custom if you already had an established club.

Even if they didn’t want to formally offer the use of the space for your club there’s little to stop you from all joining the sauna and making use of their space. You’d all simply be customers arriving at the same time to make use of their facilities.

Men’s saunas just want (and need) the custom. If your group just suddenly started arriving every other Monday and making use of the shower room for a jack off party they’re not likely to be complaining about it. They might want to adopt the event as a formal club.

Always remember that different venues have different rules. Make sure their rules and space are compatible with your group and plans.

3. Operation

An established club or men’s sauna likely has everything needed and ready to go. Starting a jack off club with them will be easier as you’re just using their space. They have the security, they have the door processes (ID check etc), they have their rules. They still might need a little advice to hold such an event if you’re not simply moving in and making use of their space without discussing it with them. For instance, a sauna usually allows for various intimate acts to take place between guests, but a jack off club usually has the rules of “no lips below the hips” and “nothing goes inside anyone”.

This will need to be properly communicated to all those in attendance. If you’re simply a group of guys getting together at a sauna to make use of their space you have to remember that there might be other guests there who have no idea this is a jack off event. It could lead to awkward encounters.

If you’re planning an event with a venue rather than just telling interested guys to all meet up there at the same time, the venue needs to understand that this is a masturbation only event.

Trust me on this, 90% of bators don’t want to go to a club where other activities are being enjoyed. I’ve seen clubs collapse in a month because they became too loose with the rules and thought no one would care. Bators are there to bate, anything else can be done on another visit or at another event. If guys want to suck or fuck they should go to a suck or fuck club, or just visit the sauna on a regular day.

The reason a lot of venues like saunas don’t hold events like the London Jack off Club is simply that they don’t realize there’s a local audience for it. If they knew they could fill their venue with 100 men once a week they would undoubtedly wish to adapt their least profitable evening into a hosted event.

Even if they don’t want to upset existing members who might be attending and expecting something more than just masturbation, most of these venues are large enough to set aside a space specifically for the club while other regular members can continue their usual activities in private rooms or other communal spaces.

Bear in mind that different venues in different states and countries have different laws to abide by. Be understanding if a venue is restricted in what they can offer for a club of this kind.

If you’re operating a new club from home or working in conjunction with a venue you might be able to implement membership fees, independent of the venue.

Not only does this allow you to pay yourself for the time you put in it can also allow you to switch venue or announce smaller gatherings elsewhere at other times, if you like.

Starting a jack off club doesn’t only allow you to hold events with lots of guys, it means you have a community of bators often seeking to meet up for one-on-one meets outside of the events themselves.

Having a small membership fee/registration process also helps to weed out the time wasters. There will, undoubtedly, be a lot of inquiries from guys who merely like the idea of a jack off club while they’re horny and bating, but that eagerness will leave them as quickly as their cum does.

Implementing a membership system, even if it’s just $20 a year, is a good way to weed these men out. Save all the information about events and locations for those who are active members, this way you’re not sending information to absolutely anyone whenever they inquire and losing control of one of your best selling points – discretion.

4. Advertising

As mentioned above, bator clubs are still considered a “niche” thing. Most people have no idea they even exist. Venues which could host events like this don’t understand the potential for an audience in their city and a lot of men who might like to share their bate with a group of other men have no idea that they’re part of a large community.

Connecting with that audience and getting them to the club is one of the hardest things, but once this process has started it soon gathers steam. Men tell each other about the new club, guys meet up with other local bators and let them know about it, smaller bator groups who usually meet up in a participant’s home join in the larger parties, online communities like ours blast it out to their newsletter subscribers and add dates to their events calendars.

Within months of starting a jack off club you could already have a few thousand local members in contact with you, a percentage of whom will attend an event.

We regularly hear from club organizers who tell us they’ve had a lot of new members who discovered the group here at BuddyBate.

It might start out with just a couple of guys in a big room wondering where everyone else is, but after a couple of events word has spread and you could be hosting a hundred men every week, like the London Jack Off Club.

EXTRA THINGS TO CONSIDER

Discretion is a key element of any club of this nature. You will have members attending who are otherwise straight in their everyday lives, men who are married, and guys who generally just want to keep this on the down-low because of their job or their social standing. When starting a jack off club you need to make sure you can respect this and make it your priority. Don’t pick a venue where men are going to be lining up outside the doors on the street under a big sign stating “Dallas’ Premier Gay Sauna!” You won’t get many participants if this is how things are done. You’re not being asked to be ashamed, you’re just expected to be reasonable in your discretion on behalf of your community.

Checking ID is a VITAL aspect of any bator club. This should go without saying. Whether you’re online or off, if you discover that someone is under the legal age you are to cut communications immediately and do everything possible to make sure they are not communicating with you again. When you’re holding events you need to be absolutely certain that every attendee is of legal age. Having a membership list and confirming ID with them all is a good way to make sure your club is entirely above board. Leaving it up to a venue to implement their own ID checks is entirely acceptable, they are on the same page as you and understand what is needed. If you’re holding events in a domestic setting or a space you entirely control, you are entirely responsible for making sure all those present are of legal age. If in doubt, don’t.

Color coded or labeled wristbands are a good idea. Whether this is for members to indicate what they’re interested in for each other’s benefit (just solo masturbation, mutual masturbation or circle jerks) or whether you’re in a communal space like a sauna where other customers might not understand (having all your members wear a “J/O ONLY” wristband sets them apart from other customers of the venue) wristbands help everyone to be on the same page and understand what is expected and accepted. While this can cost a little, it’s peanuts. You can get blank plastic or paper bands and simply mark them as required if you want to keep costs even lower.

You might want to supply certain things for members. If you’re making use of a sauna there will likely be complimentary lubricant and cleansing wipes etc available for members to freely use. If you’re hosting an event in a private setting you should make sure members know to bring their own, but also be ready to supply things such as lube, hand wipes or towels. This is merely being a good host.

You’re not likely to have 100 members at the first event. While the Paris Jacks club had 80 attendees for its first ever event in 2021 I believe this was the result of extensive online and offline communication between existing bators in the city. Unless you have such contacts already it’s unlikely you’ll have that many confirmed attendees. Don’t be disheartened, though. Continue to hold events and continue to promote them in the right places (like here at BuddyBate!) and your audience will grow. We know of numerous clubs that started with 2 members (right before Covid) and now have 100. If they could grow like that during a pandemic, you can grow much faster now that it’s over and everything is back to normal.

Start building now, even if you don’t plan to hold an event yet. There is nothing to stop you from starting a webpage and collecting newsletter subscribers ready for when you launch. The longer you have to build that potential audience the more successful your first meeting will be. If you started a website now and began collecting subscribers for when you can hold your first event, you might have 100 local men ready to go to the very first party.

Don’t rely on online services to manage things for you, secure your own hub. If you remember the collapse of Blogger, the adult purge of Tumblr, and (more recently) the end of Yahoo! groups, you’ll understand this – BUY YOUR DOMAIN. If you build everything on a service like Yahoo! and it goes down, you’re done. Several groups have discovered this recently. Clubs with thousands of members using Yahoo groups to organize have been left homeless. Whether it’s a free groups site like Yahoo or a social network like BateWorld, you shouldn’t give another company control of your club. It really isn’t complicated to make and maintain your own online presence entirely under your control. Watch a couple of YouTube videos about hosting and installing WordPress, add the free MailPoet plug in and you’re good to go. This costs less than $5 a month.

If you’re not able to start a website, start a social media account. As mentioned above, having your own website is best, but signing up for a Twitter or Reddit account is easy and free and the next best option, at least until you’re able to get your website running. You don’t need to publicly announce events to all on whichever social media site you choose, you can request that new followers send you their email address. You then have a list of contacts to inform when you have an event planned. This also allows us to start promoting your group to our readers. We are unable to promote your club if we have nowhere to send prospective members and they have no means to get in touch with you. More importantly, having your own domain shows that you’re serious and not just engaging in a personal fantasy.

Try to stick to the traditional naming convention. Most clubs stick to [CityName]Jacks. For example, NYJacks, ParisJacks, BostonJacks. A lot of men, when seeking a jack off club in their area, might use this naming convention to search for their group. It’s not a hard and fast rule and you won’t be shunned for doing things differently, but you could get a little boost by using this format.

Get in touch with other club owners around the world. Don’t be shy about it, almost every bate club organizer in the world loves to hear from other club organizers. You’re not in competition with each other. Men who travel like to visit a club in another city while there and there are a lot of guys who have been to several bator clubs around the world. This is a big community and we like to be in touch. Reach out to other club organizers if you have any questions or need support. Almost everyone wants to help build the community together.

Be consistent. Most people work Mon-Fri, so weekends are usually the best time to host an event. People like consistency they can plan around, so if you’re seeking to build a good community it’s best to hold your events routinely, like every second Sunday of the month, for example.

JACK OFF CLUB CHECKLIST

1. Choose a name, [yourcity]Jacks is usual format.
2. Buy a domain and cheap hosting (you only need the smaller plan usually less than $5 a month). Or start a social media account for the group.
3. Install WordPress and a newsletter plugin on your website and write a basic page with information about the club, rules, plans etc. Alternatively start collecting contact information for social media followers interested in joining your club.
4. Let us know about it (visit the contact page), so that we can promote your new club to our audience.
5. Decide on a venue, domestic (can you host?) or an existing sauna/club.
6. Contact said sauna/club to inquire about using their venue for a meeting, or simply organize to all attend on the same day.
7. Host your first party and have a great time.
8. Let us know how it went so that we can write a post to further promote your group.
9. Inform us of new dates to come so that we can add them to the events calendar and attract new local members.

If there’s anything you think we’ve missed, please leave a comment below and we will update this post if necessary.

Starting a jack off club can be so easy, once you have the group established it’s a lot of fun and very rewarding. We hope you’ll consider it and we’ll soon be able to promote your local group to our audience.