Join The International BuddyBate Club - BuddyBate

Join The International BuddyBate Club

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Ever wondered if that guy behind the bar would be interested in rubbing one out over porn with a pal? Ever thought that friend you’ve known for a couple of years might be down for stroking but you haven’t been able to ask? The BuddyBate merch project gives them, and you, a chance to subtly display your interest and find guys at random in your local area. Using this map of anonymized data you can see how many various items have been delivered to visitors of the site in every city and town around the world! Check it out, and get yours today if you haven’t already.

All BuddyBate merch is shipped internationally and in secure and plain packaging with no mention of BuddyBate visible.

Why BuddyBate Merch?

Wouldn’t it be great if, wherever you went, you could discreetly display your love of bating and your desire to find buddies to enjoy it with?

There are baters all around the world, in your city/town

We know from the visitor data we see every month that there are hundreds of thousands of men all around the world – in cities as big as London, Paris and New York, and as small as Lubbock TX, Alexandria MN, and even Grand Junction CO – who love masturbation and want to share it with other men. This number is only growing. There are millions of men who really want to meet up with other men for friendly sessions of porn watching and perhaps mutual bating, and we want to find them all and bring them together to share their hobby!

With BuddyBate merch you can subtly signal to others in-the-know that you’re interested in exploring this hobby with other guys. You can choose from the discreet variant of the logo (kept out of online content) or the BOLD options which display the round logo at the top of the page.

It’s discreet, affordable, unique. You’ll be joining a massive audience of men from all around the world who love the bate and want to share their experiences with others.

Imagine going to the gym with a pin on your ball cap and finding another guy wearing the same. Consider the possibility of heading to class on campus and passing another guy with a button on his bag. Think about the opportunities of going out for a drink and seeing a guy sitting at the next table with a BuddyBate beanie on his head.

You immediately know where he got it from, and he likely knows of your interest too thanks to the identical merch you’re wearing.

What Does The Discreet Design Look Like?

Well, you’ll find out if you get yours. We intentionally keep the design of the discreet merch under wraps, this is to help maintain discretion for guys who have them, and to encourage other readers to participate. The discreet design is the same across all the DISCREET merch, while the BOLD design is a direct copy of the round logo at the top of this page.

Why the BuddyBate map?

Instead of just hoping that some interested or curious guys in your immediate area are members of the community, we offer the map above to show general data for what has been shipped to each area. This helps you to understand how many guys there are in your town/city.

While we of course won’t be sharing any personal identifiable data (it goes without saying that the points on the map do not correspond to any physical address), visitors will be able to see how many guys in their local area have purchased something. Just by looking at the interactive map you’ll be able to see that 150 lapel pins have been sent to readers in Brooklyn NY, that we’ve sent 20 t-shirts to guys in New York, or that 38 men in Lethbridge Alberta could be going about their day wearing a baseball cap with the discreet BuddyBate logo on it.

Who knows, maybe your closest friends and colleagues will suddenly be showing off the logo, opening the door to a new level of camaraderie.

Not only will the map give you a great indicator of how many men in your local vicinity you could encounter for some interesting friendships, it’s a great way to encourage others to buy their own merch. As you can imagine, if a visitor to the site really wants to bate with someone and they see that another 100 men in their town or city are down for it, they’re gonna want to be showing off that logo!



Is delivery discreet?

Yes, always. You have an option of BOLD merch displaying the round community logo, or discreet options that depict a variation of the round blue logo, but only those who have bought them know what the discreet version looks like and what they mean. We don’t include any other information in the package, just the items. They are delivered discreetly and securely with no mention of this site or what’s inside. For international shipping we are required to add a “CN22” sticker to the back of some shipments, but this will only show the weight of the package, the value and currency, and make mention of “stickers” or “buttons” as appropriate. There is no reason for anyone else to have any idea what is inside and even if someone else were to open it all they would find are buttons/stickers with a blue design and the wording, which would mean nothing to them unless they bought some too.

What do BuddyBate Buttons look like?

Our DISCREET buttons are simple badges, 25mm in diameter, blue and white (the colors of the site) with a central shape reminiscent of the round logo. They’re common concave metal in shape with a matt finish. We do not show their precise appearance as we want to maintain a level of discretion for those wearing one, and encourage readers to buy their own.

What do BuddyBate stickers look like?

They’re exactly the same design as the buttons. We have forms of sticker available including window clings (non adhesive). Smaller stickers are 37mm in diameter, larger stickers and window clings are 80mm in diameter. They’re durable and should last for a considerable time even in exposed locations such as on cars or mailboxes.

What are the lapel pins like?

We have two versions of metal lapel pins available. One is the BOLD Pin which displays the round logo as seen in the header logo at the top of the page. The other DISCREET pin is identical to the design on the stickers and buttons, with a variant of a round blue and white logo which is only recognizable to community members who also have buttons/stickers or the discreet lapel pin.

Where can I get mine?

At this time they’re only available through our partners at BlokeToys. We might seek to “license” the production and delivery of them inside the US in the future. We sell the buttons and larger stickers in packs of two, the smaller stickers in packs of five, and we offer the BuddyBate pack, which includes a lapel pin, two buttons, two large stickers, two window clings, two transparent stickers (no white) and five small stickers. All of these options are available at

We’ve also expanded the range with t-shirts, coffee mugs, baseball caps, hoodies and more.

What does the BuddyBate Map show?

When someone purchases BuddyBate items from BlokeToys we add the city/town to the map, or increase the count accordingly for that area. Each icon on the map represents a town or city, not individuals. This is to allow visitors to see how many other guys in their location have them, and to encourage them to participate. For instance, we may have sold 200 buttons or stickers to bators in Dallas, and we’ll show that on the map so that visitors in that area are encouraged to participate and get their own.

Why do some small towns show more buttons sold than major cities?

There are existing bate groups all over the world. Occasionally we’ll hear from a group in a small town who already bate together but want to attract new members. So, in instances like this, they might buy ten buttons and fifty stickers for their existing members to show off in the hope of attracting new members to their circle. In contrast, some cities don’t have an active scene or members of those groups might not have found us yet.

No one else in my town/city is on the map, why should I buy one?

Other visitors to the map are probably saying the same thing. This merch project requires participation. If you buy merch we’ll add a pin to the map for your location, which in-turn might encourage others like you to buy theirs. If everyone looks at the map waiting for someone else in their town/city to appear before they get theirs, no one will ever appear in that location.

What do I do if I see someone wearing BuddyBate merch?

Relax, chill out, they’re interested in the same thing you are and you can chat like buddies. There are no “code words”, this isn’t a spy mission, there’s no secret handshake and you don’t need to give them a special wink. They’re just a guy looking to bate with other guys and all you need to do is get talking. You’re sharing a hobby, it’s no different to seeing a guy wearing a band t-shirt and having a drink talking about their last album.

What if someone I work with or a friend knows what it is?

Then it worked. Only guys interested in bating with other guys know what our DISCREET merch looks like, and they’ll only know of the BOLD round logo if they’ve been here or followed our social media. They’re only available from us, they shouldn’t know without either buying one themselves or perhaps getting an inkling by visiting this site or knowing someone else in the community. There is no reason BuddyBate merch should be able to “out you” to anyone who isn’t already a part of this community or interested in the same thing.

Where should I wear my BuddyBate merch?

Anywhere you feel is appropriate. We know a lot of our readers wear their BuddyBate t-shirt or tank to the gym, we know guys put the stickers on water bottles, on their bike helmet, or they wear their beanie or ball cap to the local bar. You really never know who you might meet and when the logo will be recognized by a fellow bator.

Where should I put stickers?

Bators have them on their mailboxes, on their lockers at work, on their hard hat on the construction site, on their water bottle out on a run, on the shower gel they use at the gym, on their front door, on the lid of their laptop, on the back of their computer on their desk in the office, on the back of their bike, on their dash… wherever you think a few guys will see it. We offer the smaller stickers in packs of five for this purpose.

How can I help spread the word?

Letting other bators you meet know about our merch is a great way to encourage their use. Social media is also a great tool for finding other guys interested in the same things, so if you tweet about it, blog it, share it on Tumblr, you could be encouraging other guys to get theirs too. If you’re already part of a bate group, why not encourage other members to get one? Readers here find other guys on tube sites, forums and through groups on sites like KIK, so why not seek out interested guys local to you and let them know about it?

My merch hasn’t arrived yet, what’s wrong?

We’ve seen that there can be delays to certain locations. Orders to Canada, Australia and some parts of the US can take longer than others. As always, you can ask the guys at BlokeToys any questions and raise any concerns you have with them and they’ll work hard to rectify any problems or provide information when needed.

Will there be other merchandise in the future?

Yes. We’re always looking at other items community members would find useful. If you have any ideas for products you’d like to see with the DISCREET or BOLD designs please let us know.

Why go to all this trouble?

Why not? It’s fun. It’s just a part of your sexual life and if there’s a way to make it easier for interested guys to find each other that can only be a good thing. Most of our readers consider themselves predominantly straight, for most guys here seeking friends for mutual masturbation isn’t as easy as walking into a gay club or using Grindr. Under those circumstances expectations are different, whereas our DISCREET merch makes it clear that both parties are interested in this specific activity. It’s actually like a social club, although a very big one, where guys can find each other in unexpected places without expectations or assumptions. What bator wouldn’t want to be a part of that?





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