Divorced and Bating

Submitted by Anonymous

After my divorce I was not prepared for the situation of being alone, and its inherent feeling of loneliness. I come from a large family, so growing up I was never alone. This may be a reason that I married early, and hence my divorce. This despondency consumed me and eventually affected my work. I knew that I had to do something or fall down the rabbit hole of depression. So, I did what anyone would do, I went online. There I found a local support group for divorced men. I am forever grateful to these men for their guidance and continued support. I am also thankful to BuddyBate, but more about that later.

At my second meeting the subject of dating and sex arose. As I sat and listened the other members discussed the issue, relating their own experiences to help each other. When the discussion seemed to be finished one man, who I will call John, disclosed that he had explored mutual masturbation activities with other men. You can imagine how the tone of the meeting changed. He revealed that he had taken out a personal ad on BuddyBate and had developed a relationship with two men. He also talked without shame about the satisfying camaraderie he felt at the J/O clubs. What surprised me was how nonjudgmental the other men were as they listen to John and supported him. I was impressed with his courage and intrigued by what he had said.

When I got home I immediately went on line to find out about BuddyBate and J/O clubs. I had a lot of questions to ask John and at the end of our next meeting invited him out for coffee. He thoughtfully answered all my questions. Then, with great emotion he recounted, almost as a confession, the “unmitigated joy” he felt the first time he masturbated one-on-one with the first man who answered his BuddyBate ad. He described his nervous anticipation as he undressed with him and the electricity between them as they stood there naked and fully erect, looking at each other. That electricity only increased as they began to touch each other, stroking each other’s chest and abdomen, then down to their genitals. Lastly, he vividly related the profound experience of holding another man’s testicles in your hand while he holds your testicles and masturbating each other, feeding off of each other’s excitement until you ejaculate and climax together, spraying your warm semen over each other’s chest and abdomen. It took him a moment or two to collect his thoughts before he continued. He then spoke of being in the safe environment of a J/O club with other naked and aroused men who were confident in whatever was their sexual orientation and the ease it was to masturbate with them. When he was done he paused, and then casually invited me to an upcoming event at a J/O club. I surprised myself when I didn’t hesitate to say yes.

To say I was self-conscious would have been an understatement. However, as soon as I checked my clothes I felt at ease. Well, growing up with three brothers and having been involved in sports all my life I guess I felt relaxed in the company of naked men. John left me on my own and I ventured forth, my erection leading the way, into the world mutual masturbation.

The first man I encountered was about my age. “Are you new?,” he asked, “I’ve never seen you here before.” “It’s my first time,” I somewhat sheepishly admitted. He raised his eyebrows and smiled. When he dipped into the jar of lube and prepared my cock to be masturbated I remembered what John had said about an electric feeling. As he took hold of my prick I wrapped my fingers around the throbbing heat of his greased erection. As we looked into each other’s eyes we started to stroke each other. It was so incredibly overpowering. Although we only spent a few minutes together it was so satisfying to share them with him. The only downside of the evening was my inability to ejaculate with anyone. I feel conflicted by this as it remains an issue in a J/O club setting. John assures me I’m still working out my feeling about the change in my life. The upside is that I was “available” all evening. It sure didn’t diminish my satisfaction in masturbating other men to completion.

After that night I found the courage to place an ad at BuddyBate. The first ad I answered worked out really well. He too was divorced so we had that connection. He introduced me to frotting. Let me tell you, with my greased hardon throbbing against his horny cock in the security of his knowledgeable hand I shared the most intense climax; the two of us spurted like geysers. Thank you BuddyBate.

Of course COVID interfered with all our lives. My divorced men’s group now meets on Zoom and I communicate with my bate buddies by phone. I am looking forward to once again visiting J/O clubs. Who knows? I may now be ready to pay back all those patient guys by shooting off in their and as they shoot their load in mine. I’m really looking forward to that!

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