Mixed wank buddy experiences

Submitted by Andy

I’ve always loved wanking. I’m 39 now and although I wank less than I used to, that’s because of lack of time and opportunities (work/long commute and being married!) rather than wanting to any less.

We put some porn on my phone but to be honest we didn’t really watch it. We both got hard almost instantly and started wanking, watching each other. It was incredible watching another guy wank his cock from so close and in real life

I guess I’ve always been interested in wanking with a mate. It started years ago. I remember finding myself thinking about what my mates and other guys did when they wanked – how they did it, what they thought about…what their dicks were like, how much they cum and all that. Always got me hard as and shooting a big load. But I was way too scared to talk about it other than the odd jokey comment.

Fast forward to uni (where I wanked so much I should’ve been given an award). My best mate from home and I used to talk about wanking a fair bit. A lot, in fact. I always wanted to wank with him, we watched porn together… But I was just too naive and had no idea how to make it happen, or even find out if he would. I remember one time him talking about not making a mess when he cum by cumming into his hand. I totally didn’t understand: when I cum it shoots and I couldn’t get how you could try that to not make a mess, it wouldn’t work for me! That conversation got me so hard and leaking though.

There was another good mate at uni, a housemate. I caught him wanking once and it was so horny. He had no idea I’d come home, I went upstairs for a chat like I often did. His door was a bit open and before I went in I saw motion. He was wanking, but not like I did it. He was naked and hard as fuck, but he was wanking by holding his fist just above the bed and fucking it. Fucking his fist like he was fucking a woman. I was hard instantly. He hadn’t seen me and he carried on pounding his fist. His cock was smaller than mine but he was clearly loving it. I didn’t see him cum… I snuck away to my own room and furiously wanked out a huge load. I wish I’d said something. Probably not then but I’d love to have wanked with him.

Probably fast forward a decade after uni. Married by that point but my love of wanking hadn’t diminished. I was on loads of forums, like this one and others, chatting about wanking. Watching vid clips of guys wanking too, not mf couples (though I wank to that too!) but also just guys wanking solo. I’m probably bi just based on that I guess but who cares, really.

I’d met another mate through work and we became really close. (We were best men at each others weddings, in fact.) We used to go drinking an evening most weeks and chatted the sort of shit you do after several beers. Wanking and porn were definitely topics.

I’m not going to lie, I really tried to engineer a wank session with him! Not immediately, but once we became good mates and I knew he liked a good wank session… I tired putting porn on after we got back from the pub (if we were home alone that is!) and we watched it and I know we both got hard. I tried rubbing my bulge through my jeans (I’m not a small guy in that department so I can make it quite evident if I’m not trying to hide it!) – but he never took the bait.

After a few years to be honest I got really frustrated and after beers out one night (more than usual, we’d really gone at it) I basically just outright suggested it. He said that he knew it’s what I’d been getting at for all those years – I guess I’m not that subtle…! But he said he’d never responded because it wasn’t for him – he’d genuinely thought about it, but wanking with a mate wasn’t for him. And he said he’d not been more definite in making that clear because he didn’t want to upset me. To be honest that upset me more! – that my clumsy hamfisted attempts at making something happen had been so obvious but so unwanted.

We’re still good mates but to be honest our friendship did take a serious knocking because of that, and it’s entirely my fault – he was great about it, and I felt like I’d been acting like some kind of unwanted sex pest. He’s moved away now (a few years ago in fact) and so we don’t see each other like we did. But we still meet up sometimes, and it’s great when we do…just a bit ‘different’. I don’t know, maybe it’s my perception only.

And then I started traveling with work for a new job and staying overnight in hotels. Craigslist personals was a thing then still and I put an ad up looking for wank buddies. I sorted through loads of timewaster replies of guys who wanted to suck me off, or fuck them… Finally I was emailing with this one guy who seemed genuine and looking for just a wank. He was married too, and said he’d never met a buddy for a wank before. He came over to my hotel. I’ve never been so nervous and scared in my entire life, I was literally shaking when I opened the door.

He seemed like a normal guy – and he was! We got naked pretty quickly, he was nervous too and it somehow helped just diving straight in. We both lay side by side on my bed. We put some porn on my phone but to be honest we didn’t really watch it. We both got hard almost instantly and started wanking, watching each other. It was incredible watching another guy wank his cock from so close and in real life, not porn. He was certainly watching me wank. We didn’t say much really, and it was entirely DIY. After a few minutes – this was no edging session! – he said he was close. Close was the word, he almost immediately started unloading into his stomach with a loud “oh fuck!” so I’m guessing it was a good one! That set me off instantly and I didn’t even get time to say I was going to cum. Even by my shooting standards it was a good one and I pumped a massive load up my body, got my neck and chest with probably 10 good shots before the rest onto my stomach. He watched it all and just laughed when I’d finished and said “looks like you needed that!” – I just said “mate I usually shoot a big load!”. We both wiped the cum off us on a towel and he got dressed and off he went. Never messaged or anything again.

That kind of set me off I guess. Every time I stayed away with work I put up a CL ad. And usually I managed to get a meet…it’s amazing what being able to host in a hotel does for increasing the chances! I got good at weeding out timewasters and guys who wanted more than a wank – although I slipped up once and had a bit of a scary moment with a guy who was quite insistent on wanting to suck me off after we’d been wanking a while. Scary just because his attitude changed when I said no, rather than because I’m scared of being sucked off – it just isn’t for me. But generally it’s all worked fine – more than fine! Mutual wanking with a buddy was inevitable and happened on like the third meet. But DIY still happened a lot too, it depended on the guy and the situation.

Quite a few gay guys I’ve ended up wanking with. That’s more than fine with me, all guys love to wank and not all gay guys are looking to fuck or get fucked! But it has mostly been other married guys, maybe they’re bi, who knows, but they’ve all loved a wank like me and that’s what matters.

I’ve also met a few guys closer to home, I guess as I’ve got more brave and confident. It’s less easy though, I live in a medium sized town and can’t host unless I’ve got the house to myself for the weekend or something – pretty rare. And CL personals has died too of course. I’ve tried Grindr too but that just isn’t a good way to find wank buddies. There needs to be a wank buddy app!

I don’t travel with work much now – although I did last week which is what prompted this ramble, because I put an ad on a forum on a different site and managed to sort out a wank session!

But really, I’m struggling a bit now to be honest. No travel, a lack of forums for ads… I’d love a mate I could wank with locally. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed the one off wanks I had when I was away with work – and I was always amazed at how many guys seem to jump at the chance for a wank with a fellow bator who can host! But I always feel like I’ve missed out on what I’ve read a lot about on this site…guys who have just a “normal” mate but who they wank with too. I’ve never had that and it makes me feel, I don’t know, wistful I guess…like I’ve been trying to fill that gap with one off wanks with guys which have been a lot of fun but not satisfying.

I’m 39 now and making new mates isn’t exactly the easiest thing, I’m a lot more senior at work so that’s not the way… and I can’t imagine attempting to line it up with any of my existing mates.

So like the title says… mixed experiences. But! – I’ve just submitted a ‘personals’ thing on here, so you never know.

---

Hey Andy!

Thanks for sending in this experience. I think a lot of guys are like you and we just don’t hear about their “near misses” that much. The truth is it’s a tough subject to get into with a mate and most guys are still stuck in that world where everything is either gay or straight and there’s no grey area. We don’t think like that, but a lot of guys still do. Even if they do get hard at the thought of wanking one out with a mate there’s still that annoying little anonymous voice in their head controlling their actions.

I’ve heard a few experiences like yours over the years, where guys find it pretty easy to hook up with wank mates for a one-time thing but then can’t seem to find that good buddy for the same. The only thing I can suggest is to keep looking, and when you find those one-time meets swap numbers. Instead of looking for mates who love a good wank, look for good wankers who are cool with finding a good buddy out of it too.

There’s a guy I sometimes meet up with in London who had the same kind of experiences as you (meeting up for random wanks at urinals, on CL, at the gym etc) but when he started swapping numbers with guys he soon had 20 in his phone and was meeting up with about 5 every month. After that he became good mates with a couple of them and they started their own circle jerk and brought other lads into it.

The last I heard they were still good mates. They’re both married, they go fishing, they work out together, they do a few of the festivals every year, and they’re still sharing their wanks any chance they get. Instead of being strangers just hooking up for wanks they’re mates who share it – which is what I think a lot of the guys reading this are looking for.

It is out there, you just need to have a lot of fun meeting new guys for good wanks until you find that one good mate.

I hope you’ll keep us updated and let us know when that happens.

If you enjoyed this post, you’re going to love Bateman’s Gully! Click here for more

---

Enjoyed this post? Please leave a comment below and say thanks to reader Andy for submitting it. Think about sharing the post too, maybe you know some guys who would like to read it? Join our NEWSLETTER for weekly updates and know when a new post like this one arrives, and why not send us your own experiences of bating with buddies, your fantasies, or just your opinions on male sexuality? Visit the CONTACT page to share your own story.

---