Straight Men And Phallophobia
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Submitted by NotADoctor
I learned that phallophobia is a thing and I had to write about it.
I’m a married guy in my 30s. I love masturbation. The few experiences I’ve had sharing it with other men have been great.
I recently had a non-bator experience with a close friend of mine and it got me thinking about performative phallophobia.
He’s straight, engaged to be married, and we recently got together to watch 28 Days Later because his girlfriend wants to watch the new one and he’d never seen the first one. I’ve got a copy on DVD so I went over to watch it with him over a few beers.
Anyone who’s seen it knows it opens with Cillian Murphy naked in a hospital bed, full-on cock show.
My friend visibly winced, looked away and did this whole performance over seeing a cock on the screen so it made me ask what the deal was. He was saying he didn’t need to see that, and that he doesn’t want to see another man’s junk.
We got into a fun debate about it after that. He’s always played sports, he works out like I do, I’ve seen plenty of cocks in the locker room and showers. Seen a couple of hard ones too.
He says that’s different. He’s not looking to see other guy’s dicks. So I pointed out that it shouldn’t be any different seeing it on a screen. He’s got a cock, we’ve all got a cock, why did he feel the need to put on this big show pretending to be disgusted by the sight of another dick?
I don’t doubt that actual phallophobia exists (there’s an actual fear of a lot of things and I’m not mocking those who actually do experience that) but what he did was definitely a performance and he admitted he’s not scared or “offended” by seeing dick.
And it’s not like all these very straight men haven’t seen plenty of hard cock in porn either.
So why the performance?
I have a theory about this. I think a lot of the time guys act like that and go over the top because they’re compensating for something. Either they like seeing dicks but don’t want anyone to know it, or they’re so worried that another guy might think they like seeing it if they don’t act like they’re seeing a live birth.
Perhaps it’s a little of both?
Personally, I’ve always thought most guys secretly like seeing other cocks. Otherwise why do so many men watch straight porn with guys in it? Why is the cum shot such a big part of it? Surely, if all these men were so disgusted by cocks they would all be watching nothing but lesbian porn?
My friend doesn’t have phallophobia, but he felt the need to put on an act. That makes me more suspicious about what he thinks about dicks than if he’d just watched the scene and not said anything, or even complimented Cillian on his manhood.
If he’d done either I would have thought he was a well-adjusted straight man who doesn’t feel the need to overcompensate.
What do the other readers of BuddyBate think? Have any of you experienced this overreaction to guys seeing or encountering other men’s penises?
