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Finding the courage...
 
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Finding the courage to actually find a bate jo buddy.

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(@masterdebater2506)
Posts: 17
Eminent Bator ConfirmedBator Registered
Topic starter
 

So I'm 43 yo now and have been jerking off since a very young age. I've known for a long time that masturbating was my obsession. I really would like a jo buddy but I'm to shy or nervous to actually go through with it. Truth be told, when I was young I had a jo buddy for a long time up until about my last year of high school. He was my cousin. Ever since then it's been so long for me. I guess my question would be does anyone have any advice on getting over the edge of nervousness and then how do you go about bringing up the subject. My best friend is really outgoing and we talk about sex and joke about jerking off and watching porn and stuff. I feel like he might could be into jo together but if I'm wrong and ask him I feel like there is a possibility I ruin the friendship or at least change it dramatically. Anybody have a similar situation and have any pointers. Thanks in advance.


 
Posted : 05/08/2025 9:42 pm
pme14, SmoothNude4JO and Rick reacted
(@mark69)
Posts: 323
Reputable Bator ConfirmedBator
 

Great question a lot of us feel the same. Sure you will get some great advice on here.I would say you are halfway there with your mate .you say he is open to talking about sex and porn so I would just casually slip it in the conversation see what response you get.i get you don't wont to ruin for friendship. But he might feel the same. You could have a night in leave some porn on by mistake. I get the been nervous. But at the end of the day you could possibly have a better friendship. Good luck let us know how it goes mate


 
Posted : 05/08/2025 10:32 pm
pme14, Frosty, Rick and 1 people reacted
(@masterdebater2506)
Posts: 17
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Topic starter
 

@mark69 I was thinking maybe one night hanging, I get drunk and just ask if he wants to jo together. Maybe if he freaks out I can use being drunk as an excuse. Idk


 
Posted : 05/08/2025 11:26 pm
Basicbi1 and Mark69 reacted
(@binoculary)
Posts: 101
Estimable Bator ConfirmedBator
 

You’re so lucky to have that early experience! Jealous.


 
Posted : 07/08/2025 6:36 pm
(@masterdebater2506)
Posts: 17
Eminent Bator ConfirmedBator Registered
Topic starter
 

@binoculary definitely the thing I miss most about my younger years. Wish I could do it all again with what I know now. Lol


 
Posted : 08/08/2025 12:14 am
Danbob reacted
(@kiwijacker)
Posts: 93
Estimable Bator ConfirmedBator
 

For me it all started by chatting with like minded people online. I still use dating sites, or places like this to reach out to potential wank buddies.

But what made me take that leap was timing.

I was chatting with a visiting American and I was so horny and erect while texting with him that I finally took the leap. It's almost like being somewhat drunk. When you are horny you are more open to things like this.

So your idea of having a few drinks is not as silly as you think.

You will need to build up to asking him, but start with a few drinks together and then start the conversation towards what turns you each on, chicks you fancy etc, maybe wank habits. Then suggest you put some porn on to explain a little more what  you mean and when you say how hard you are, he may say the same.

If he does admit to being hard, then there is a good chance you can both get your cocks out there and then and go from there.


 
Posted : 23/08/2025 7:25 pm
(@basicbi1)
Posts: 331
Honorable Bator ConfirmedBator
 

@masterdebater2506 that scenario actually worked for me and a buddy and it has been the best friendship I could ever have over the last 30 years. Try it. Everybody's a wildcard when they're buzzed. Consider it a free pass.🍻


 
Posted : 05/09/2025 6:24 pm
(@pme14)
Posts: 477
Honorable Bator ConfirmedBator
 

When I 1st decided to explore my sexuality with other like minded males in my age group of 40-75, and guys who enjoyed wearing sexy lace panties, I was told to explore a website, called, Doublelist.com and I was told that it was free and I could find like minded guys in my area, Chicagoland area. 
After I signed up, and started looking in the Chicagoland area, I couldn’t believe at how many like minded guys were out there! 
Then, more recently, I was told about Bateworld, and let me tell you, it’s another great site for guys to explore and chat and sometimes get together!

Paul 

 


 
Posted : 19/12/2025 12:08 am
Danbob reacted
(@smoothnude4jo)
Posts: 7
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A saying we have at nudist camps is:  you can make friends with nudist, butt you can't make friends beCUM nudists!

HOWEVER, thanks to the IP Casino Spa allowing some of we locals to "join" (had to pay an "ANNUAL FEE" upfront), I got to know quite a few locals in Biloxi that were OK jacking in front of each other.

One day, I walked into the steam room and saw a co-worker from my (fairly large company) on his knees sucking cock.  HE WAS MORTIFIED and rushed out.  So I made a point to go see him at work (it took a few days to catch him) and privately assure him that I admired his conduct and would "help him" next time Bi serving as a LOOKOUT!  

He was quite relieved.  BUTT YOU CAN SEE where THIS sort of validates that we can BEFRIEND fellow masturbators.  I'm quite comfortable (NOW....but it took awhile) BEING known as a masturbator.  My wife sure knows!  (tho we no longer fuck or "play").  While I am TEMPTED to buy a pin and selectively wear it or a sticker and possibly "stick it," am I really ready to let my vehicle display it?  No.

This is almost like the rules in "Fight Club."  When I walk in an AT (Adult Theater), I'll pull my cock out and NOT be shy.  Why?  Because NO ONE enters an AT not knowing that men whack off there!  It's kin to visiting a nudist camp.


 
Posted : 21/05/2026 4:08 pm
pme14 reacted
(@smoothnude4jo)
Posts: 7
Active Bator ConfirmedBator
 

BateWorld (BW) is a FANTASTIC "spot to shop!"  In addition to finding 2 great bate buddies to meet at a nice nudist spot every Wed to JO outdoors Bi a pool, with "verification" you can get a check mark bi your profile name indicating your age is verified legally to "CAM JACK."  

Being the smooth nudist that I am it is a wonderful way to share and experience the pleasures of being an Exhibitionist and Voyeur with other men also legally aged!

MASTURBATION is the ULTIMATE safe sex and BW exposed me to the concept of "solo sexual" as an explanation for the pleasure of doing it alone on cam for others to watch and enJOy which makes it VERY EFFICIENT as well.

BiSexual Playground (BSP) does not have CAM butt its chat rooms (mild and wild) offer the ability to share your own nude images or inspirational porn images like my favorite Trans Miran.

With two screens I can watch my own video bate and that of others watching me PLUS use porn as bate fuel!  Both BW and BSP offer free memberships along with paid ones that allow more usage.  I'm a life member at BSP and an annual member at BW.

Mind you, BuddyBate is a well oiled machine for masturbation inspiration and self confidence that I am still getting the feel of.  LOVE THIS FORUM.

 


 
Posted : 09/06/2026 12:14 pm
Danbob, Volt and pme14 reacted
(@pme14)
Posts: 477
Honorable Bator ConfirmedBator
 

I too feel that Mutual masturbation with other like minded males, is the ultimate way to bond with guys who like to watch each other stroking themselves and possibly lend a helping hand to their fellow strokers! And you are so right, it’s a great way to enjoy safe sexual pleasure with others without the pressure of guys who want other types of sexual intimacy!

 I have found that Mutual Stroking pleasures with other guys is a great way to relieve stress and that hard-on that we always get from thinking about our Hard Cocks, needing to be played with, besides its nice to have someone else’s hands stroking you off, once in a while!

 I really love that amazing feeling of someone else’s hands playing with me!

and I also really enjoy the feeling of stroking another guys cock, making it jump and pulsate in my hands!

paul 


 
Posted : 09/06/2026 1:19 pm
(@pme14)
Posts: 477
Honorable Bator ConfirmedBator
 

@smoothnude4jo 

I totally agree with you about BW being a great place to explore with other like minded individuals, of all ages, just as long as they are over 21 years old! I also have found that, Doublelist.com is a great resource for finding like minded individuals who enjoy whatever we might be interested in! Since you can look up your area!

paul 


 
Posted : 23/09/2026 4:37 am
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