How do I hide a wank toy from my girlfriend?
Submitted by DesperateDanny
I really want a new toy but I need to be able to hide it from my girlfriend. She’s a prude about things and when we started seeing each other she found my wank sleeve under my bed and made me throw it out. That was two years ago and now we live together and we’re not fucking as much as we used to. I love wanking (and reading about it) and even when we’re more active I still like to wank at least once a day. I mostly do it in the shower but sometimes I find the time to rub one out at work.
A Fleshlight is too big (and expensive) but there are loads of smaller and cheaper ones I would love to try I just need a good place to hide it so if anyone has any ideas that would be great.
Keep bating guys!
Hi Danny.
Yours is a common problem. Even if they don’t have a prudish partner a lot of men would just prefer to keep their toys secret and avoid questions. Fleshlights are great but you’re right about them being hard to hide. They can be pretty big and bulky and it’s not like they’re really well disguised as anything other than what they are.
We promote BlokeToys a lot on the blog because they’re good friends of ours and they have a lot of awesome toys for guys to try, so I hope you’ll consider checking them out. They plenty of discreet and compact toys that are far easier to hide, too – and cheaper than a lot of places.
I would recommend choosing a simple sleeve, or a cup. You can also get little Tenga eggs that really easy to hide at the back of a cupboard or on top of something that might be more out of reach of curious eyes. Basic sleeves can be folded or rolled up to be even smaller and you can put these almost anywhere.
I’ve heard of guys hiding their toys in all kinds of places. The shed or the garage are probably the most typical, mostly because that’s where guys consider it “their space” and their partners are less likely to encroach. It’s also where a lot of guys hang out together and share their bate, likely for that same reason.
I’ve also heard several stories from guys who keep their toys, porn and lube etc in the car. That’s not just because they wank in the car or have an outdoor spot to go to when they want to get a load out, some of them just keep it all there for when their partner is out of the house.
Other readers even keep their toys at work. We have readers who work in the trades and keep their toys and porn magazines etc in the van. Other readers have an office and keep their toys in a drawer.
Without knowing your lifestyle and home situation it’s hard to offer any real solutions that you might not have already thought of, but I’m sure there is a way for you to hide something simple if you’re really creative about it.
I hope other readers will offer some solutions in the comments, so check back or sign up for notifications to the comments and maybe we can collectively give you enough ideas that you can be enjoying some good toys for your wanks soon 🙂
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Take apart an old laser printer or fax machine, throw out the guts, and put the case back together. Lots of people have a printer that they don’t throw out because they probably just need to get a cartridge for, but which hasn’t been used in ages, but they can’t be bothered to totally give up on it and take it to an e-waste disposal place. Ask if your friends have something like that, or a dead fax machine, or stop by a computer repair place or pawn shop and ask if they have a “lost cause” printer/fax they they probably haven’t gotten around to throwing out because it’s on a shelf that’s too high. “I got serious paperwork from my last divorce and uh maybe enjoyable substances that I don’t want my curious roommates stumbling onto… again.”
This is some next level thinking! I like it lol
For keeping in the garage: inside a tidy can, inside a beat-up looking paint can… to blend in with the other beat-up paint cans that you’ve got in the garage! Get the flecks of actual real paint out of the can (and store: can in a can), because who knows what chemistry happens when dried up paint touches whatever your wank toy is made of.
Or go to Home Depot and ask if they have old cans of that or motor oil. Just say “this is for hiding things!” and they will get you right what you want. There’s always stuff that everybody has decided it’s not THEIR job to actually throw out, but nobody ever does, so they’ll be happy if you take it off their hands.
Aaaand finally: besides Home Depot, some kinds of places have electronics that they haven’t just thrown out yet– maybe you just ask, maybe at actually just says: “AS IS $15″….. So think: VHS deck, or computer case vintage 2005, or DVD deck from when those were brand new and the cases were fat.
Just tell the clerk-etc: “I’m trying to HIDE THINGS!- NOT from the cops, don’t care- but like a bit bottle of Jack Daniels, from my idiot brother, etc…. Do you have a good ‘case’, maybe empty inside, maybe you’d want to strip for parts, or I could do that?”
People in shops, or especially ewaste places, ofren live for this challenge. You’re not the first person who has asked them for a thing for a hiding place– not even the first person TODAY who asked. Start with thrift shops, electronics repair shops, pawn shops.
(Or: I once had a medium-sized drill in the garage that nobody will bother fiddling with… Hollowed out, it could hold uh,… a whole cylinder of gold-pressed latinum! I passed it on to a buddy who needed a hiding place even more than me!)
When getting a case, look for one that kust sliding a panel can open, not lugging open three sides at once. Get it home, throw out the insides, then put stickers on it: “MIKE’S- WHICH CONVERSION???” then in different handwriting (a friend’s) a sticker: “WOULD NEED: SWAP 220V+”
(Youtube COMMENTS on videos about hiding things are worth reading)
Hey Man! Been there. I’m a married. I’ve got a fleshlight, some other toys like cockrings and stuff. My older son’s 19. I made a deal with him, I hide my fleshlight and stuff in his dresser drawer. Wife would never look, and if she did she wouldn’t say anything. I told son he could use it if he wants, guys helping guys.
Luckily I don’t have that problem anymore. The wife knows I have a fleshlight, and I sometimes use it in front of her. I bought her a dildo so she didn’t feel left out. ?
Back when I was with my ex wife, I hid it in a gym bag in our basement.
When I was living at home still, I hid my fleshlight on my desk. My mom never found it (unlike my blowup doll…). My dad went to use it, thinking it was an actual flashlight. I made a deal with him that if he didn’t say anything to mom, he could use it whenever he wants. Worked out great.